6 Month since Gotcha Day!

I truly cannot believe that 6 months ago today, I was standing in a hotel lobby in Hohhot, Inner Mongolia, China ready to meet my precious Kaylee Yu Mei for the very first time!  In some ways it feels like it was just yesterday because the time has flown.  In other ways, it feels like she's been a part of my life forever and I can't imagine how I ever lived without her in it!

These last 6 months have been a roller coaster ride of emotions for sure.  They've been some of the most challenging and rewarding of my entire life.  But when you see these pictures side by side, you see the difference that is made by giving these little ones a place to call home, the individual nurturing every child needs and deserves, some things to call their own, and constant assurances that this is forever.  

      Scared little girl on Gotcha Day 4/22/12

                                                                               

What a difference!  She DOES have a silly side!  

When I brought her home 6 months ago, she was so afraid of me leaving her that she screamed if she couldn't fall asleep laying on me.  It took up to 2.5 hrs sometimes.  All this while I was completely exhausted in every way from the trip...and she was too.  Tonight, 6 months later, she goes to sleep in her own room in her own bed after her bedtime routine with Mama while I sat in the hallway outside her room checking emails on my iPad.  Oh how very far we've come!  Granted, she will wonder into my room about 4 hours later and climb in bed, but the progress is astounding in such a short time.
6 months ago, I literally had to carry her everywhere while I did everything.   She wouldn't go anywhere without me...even into another room.  If I left her sight for even a second, she'd go into sheer panic mode!  Today, 6 months later, she spent the afternoon with the Hensons.  When I walked into their house 3 hours later she looked up and said, "Hi Mama!  Come sit! Play! Play!"  When at home, she still doesn't like me out of her sight for more than 5 minutes, but again...oh how far we've come!
6 months ago, my little precious knew NO English except "Bye Bye".  Today, she is CONSTANTLY shocking me with her 3-4 word sentences in English!  Truly astounding!
6 months ago I had never seen one picture of her smiling.  I really was concerned and wondered if she was just incredibly serious and I might not ever see her smile.  Today, she is a total crack up!  She makes everyone around her laugh with her antics and WONDERFUL personality!  It's been like watching a caterpillar turn into a butterfly!
6 months ago when she came to me, Kaylee literally had the clothes on her back, an authentic Mongolian outfit given to her by the orphanage,and a little jacket we had sent to her the month before.  She had no concept of anything of her own.  Today, one of her VERY favorite words is "MINE"!  So great to see such typical 2 year old behavior.
When I look at these pictures words can't even describe how blessed I feel.  This precious child chose to give me her trust, her love, and her affection.  She didn't have to choose that.  I'm so thankful to our Heavenly Father for giving me a child who is incredibly smart, compassionate, hard working, hilarious, eager to please, and strong willed (Okay, sometimes right now I'm not completely thankful for THAT part, but I know it's what made her a survivor and will make her tenacious and successful in the future! ;)

I'm thankful for the nannies who apparently took good care of her and taught her its okay to become attached. They so clearly prepared her that she was getting a Mama.

It takes a lot of patience and endurance on both of our parts, but oh the rewards!  Happy 6 month Gotcha Day, My little Kaylee Yu Mei!  I can't wait for many many more celebrations of Gotcha Day anniversaries!   I'm so glad I GOTCHA!!!

Kaylee's surgery

I would sure appreciate prayers tomorrow for Kaylee's surgery.  She'll be having her adenoids out as well as a tube put in her ear.  She will also have a CT scan on her ear that has Microtia to see what inner ear parts are present.  Please pray:

• There will be inner ear parts present in the Microtia ear
• They will allow me to go back and be with her until she is asleep.  She's still experiencing a lot of separation anxiety and insecure attachment
• The surgery etself will be successful and uneventful

The surgery will be at 7:00, so we have to be there at 6:00.  That will be a challenge for my highly routined little princess.  The procedure with CT scan will take about an hour.

I so appreciate your prayers and support.

A praise is that my sweet girl no longer has to have 1 eye patched.  The doctor believes the eye with the tiny pupil may have very good vision.  Therefore, we put "dops" (drops) in each morning that dilate that eye, and she is now sporting some new "glassesses" as well. These are to help correct the astigmatism in the other eye.   Of course the only way I get the drops in without a crying spell is the promise of FIVE M&M's!  She's quite the deal maker!  

And here is a fun new pic!  Mimi was showing Kaylee how to be a gourmet chef with play doh!
















I don't have a lot of time, but there's one sweet story I have to share.  Kaylee's precious Great Grandma "Boom Boom" went to heaven last week.  Whenever she says her name I remind her she is with Jesus now.  This morning, she said, "Boom Boom?  JESUS"!  It was so precious.  

10 Weeks Home today!

Wow, it's been over a month since I've updated.  Please forgive!  The great news is that Kaylee has come so far that she's keeping me extremely busy making it difficult to keep up with 2 jobs and her, let alone blogging!  But tonight marks 10 weeks that we've been home, so I have to share!  Unbelievable to me.  It literally feels like yesterday and I can't imagine life without my Sweetie Pie!

I want to encourage all of you who may be reading this and are just getting home from China or are in that extraordinarily trying 2-3 weeks of jet lag.  You WILL make it.  I truly felt like there was no light at the end of the tunnel.  I brought home a toddler who was darling as could be, highly intelligent with a precious sweet side but also a 2 year old stubborn side.  And this toddler spoke virtually no English, therefore was not interested in books or videos.  She also had no interest in most of the toys in her room.  Her only interest was me.  Though I was thrilled at the quick attachment, I realized it was an insecure attachment of "You're all I've got and all I know here, so I'm clinging to you."  I felt like that would never change.  I thought I'd never sleep again because of her jet lag, difference in bed time routine throwing her off, and night terrors.  I felt like she'd still be eating while sitting on my lap at the age of 10!  And I felt sure I'd break my back from carrying her around till she weighed 60 pounds!  I thought I'd be home bound because she screamed bloody murder in the car seat.  And the irrational fears went on and on.  I'm sure there are those that can face it all more rationally and with a clear head,  but I was not one of them.  Sleep deprivation, an exhausting and stressful international trip, extreme lifestyle change, and a 2 year old can do that!  BUT....as I said, there IS light at the end of the tunnel!  A wonderful bright shining light that makes you almost forget how dark things once seemed!  So, hang in there!

Only 1 night terror since I last wrote.  HUGE praise to God on that one!  She adores bath time, no issues with car seats, high chairs, shopping carts, or stroller!  For the first time tonight she ran around like all the other 2 year olds at Incredible Pizza.  Except that she was mostly intrigued with how the card scanners worked.  (That's my little engineer!)  She went to the mall with Pop Pop and played independently, running around and sliding, etc. with all the other children!  (And she went with him away from me while I taught lessons!) She adores her pool and never wants to get out!  She'll allow me to go to another room for a couple of minutes now without being scared and has even come to find me the last couple of days!  I can tell there's still some fear there when I'm not in her sight, making sure I'm not abandoning her.  But she's MUCH more securely attached now.  Amazing for just 10 weeks home in my opinion!  She knows about 70 English words now that she initiates.  However, she must comprehend hundreds or more because she seems to ALWAYS know what I'm asking her or telling her to do.  This has relieved a lot of stress for both of us.  We're really beginning to see her hilarious sense of humor.  She has SO many expressions.  I think she's gonna be a speach and drama diva like her Mimi.  And she LOVES music like her mama.  Wants to sing int he microphone and play piano every day.  Fine by me!  :)

Still not much interest in books.  We're working on that one, but she is just 2 after all!  She still loves toys she has to figure out.  However, she has branched out and adores her play kitchen.  Anything to do with cooking or cleaning, she enjoys.  Ooooooh how I hope THAT continues!  ;)  These are two things Mommy does NOT enjoy and I am happy to indulge her if she wants to do ti for me!

What's amazing is that she can be so typically 2 one minute, and the next have such a mature wise look on her face and in her eyes.  It's always a reminder to me that she's been through a lot and I think she knows it.  She seems to consider everything carefully and mull it over.  She's tender hearted if someone is hurt and insists on kissing the "Ouch".  And if a child is crying, she wants to go help.  She has so many wonderful sides to her  And even that strong willed stubborn side has fueled her to overcome adversities most of us will never imagine.  So much more to tell but I'm fading, so will have to continue later.

Now for the fun part...pictures!  She had her first JC Penny photo shoot recently, so I'll start with a few of those!

At each meal, Kaylee does "prayer hands" and bows her head.  At the end when the "Amen" is said she shouts, "Hallelujah"!  It's priceless!  So, right after this sweet pic was taken, the photographer was a little shocked when she got a "HALLELUJAH!"  all of a sudden!  

The orphanage gave us this traditional Mongolian outfit.  Too precious!  

No, she did not hurt her ankle.  She found her way into one of Mimi's kitchen drawers at the cabin and felt that her rolling pin cover would be put to much better use as an ankle brace, took off her shoe, and there ya have it!  

Happy 4th Everyone!  I'm a new citizen!  

We were in the car with Mimi who needed to run in Hobby Lobby.  So, I said Kaylee needed a new diaper, so we'd stay and I'd change her.  BUT, she'd drunk an entire glass of water at dinner, so the diaper hadn't done the job.  Since I was coming right home, I decided to just take off the "icky" outfit as she called it.  Then she wanted to wear mommy's pearls. And THEN she wanted to stand up in the moon roof and yell, "Miiiiii Miiiiiii!"   Mimi about dropped her bags of loot and fell on the ground laughing when she came out.  I'm sure everyone else enjoyed the entertainment as well!  

Then Pop Pop was waiting to take Mimi home when we got to my house and she of course had to complete the "ensemble" with his ball cap!  Hey, at least she knows a giro's gotta have her pearls!  And yes, that is mommy's iPhone that is now off limits!  '

This one and the next are at gymnastics.  Move over Nadia!  

Well Friends,

Big praise!  Miss K did NOT have a night terror last night!  She had 1 last Thursday during the day, 1 on Monday night, 2 on Tuesday night, and 1 on Wednesday night, but NONE last night!  Please continue to pray with me that these stop.  I read Psalm 91 to her 5 times as she fell asleep.

I found out she LOVES the library!  I've been taking her regularly, and Mimi took her yesterday while I taught.  Only problem is that she did NOT want to leave!  Fortunately the wonderful Hardesty Regional Library is within walking distance, so we are able to frequent it and also get in some good exercise.

Mommy LOVES this pic that Mimi took!

So far my little Princess has shown little interest in books or being read to.  Hoping that changes soon.  Our friend Christi gave her a book that's a puzzle which does hold her interest longer than any other.  Maybe the trips to the library, seeing other children read and being read to will spark some interest.  Of course she's only 2, right!  But she's one smart little 2!

Also, Kaylee Mei will become a gymnast beginning Wednesday!  She has been enrolled in the Mommy and Me class at Tulsa School of Gymnastics.  I took her to tour the place, not ever knowing how shell react to new situations.  She tried to pull away from me and run and play the entire time!  YEPPIE!  She's small, extremely strong, and extraordinarily limber.  She may take to this like a fish to water!  At least I believe she'll have lots of fun and be able to play along side peers her age!  I'm sure I'll have some fun pics from that first day!  

Last but not least, she's doing amazing with potty training.  I'll spare you the details of this topic, but Mommy's very proud...and happy!  

I could use all of you prayer warriors out there.  Kaylee has begun having night terrors.  If you don't know what they are, pray you never have to whiteness your child having one.  She is fully asleep but with eyes wide open.  But it's like she's staring through me.  She screams bloody murder for anywhere from 15-45 minutes and there's nothing I can do.  She kicks and claws, then reaches for me.  Again, asleep the entire time.  I, however, of course am not sleeping through any of this.  And it's emotionally draining as well.  She fights going to sleep with a passion, and I can't blame her if she knows those night terrors are coming.  She and I both need for these to stop immediately.  I'd appreciate your prayers.

In the meantime, the little genius got a new little toddler potty last night and has already gone in it THREE times successfully.  Even came over to tell me she needed to use it once.  WOW!  How can one thing be so easy and another area be so difficult1

She has also begun doing "prayer hands" before meals, which is the cutest thing ever!  Then she says, "Amen!" very loud!

She has also successfully parted from my house to go with Mimi and Pop Pop twice now.  She asks about me, where I am, but is okay with hearing, "We'll see Mama in an hour".  This has allowed me to do some minimal teaching again.  Thanks Mimi and Pop Pop!  This Mama needed a little normalcy in her life right now.  Amazingly Mimi and Pop reported that as they drove down my street, Kaylee recognized our house without prompting and screamed with excitement to see "Mama"!  I've had so many people park in the house next door because the 2 look so much alike.  Amazing my brand new 2 year old can tell already!

Interestingly she is still extremely clingy around the house.  Wants to hold my hand or be held 90% of the time.  However, get her out in a public place and she'll run off.  Not so far that she can't see me.  She wants to know I'm there.  But why she is so independent in public crowded places, but so clingy, sometimes literally walking with both arms wrapped around me on my feet, in my house, I will NEVER be able to understands.  It seems backwards to me.

There are so many sweet and hilarious times with her.  I treasure them all!  But there are also great challenges and difficulties and this mama is running on empty.  All of the required education hours and degrees in the world can't really prepare you for what lies ahead in the process of attachment for an internationally adopted child.   the rewards make it worth it, but it is quite grueling.

As always, thanks for your sweet comments, emails, prayers, and support.

Co-Captain Kaylee with Captain Pop Pop!  She dug driving that boat!

Driving that boat is tiring!

My little ham!

Unbelievable that my little one who screamed and screamed over anything resembling a bath for 3 weeks is this same little "fishy"!



She LOVED the pool in Branson!



Born to shop!



We did slide, swings, and sat on this giant turtle!




All girl! Mimi's giving the Mani/pedi!









And enjoying Mommy's mani too!


My baby girl is doing remarkably well. She had her first pediatrician appt. here and he said she had been well cared for and was very healthy...even her teeth. Such a blessing! She had a few tears but nothing close to the trauma at the medical office in China. Thanks for your prayers! She has appts. with a pediatric vision specialist and ear specialist in June. I'll be eager to get more details on her Corneal Leukoma and the Microtia condition of her ear.

She is amazingly attached to me. This of course is a blessing, however it is manifesting in her wanting to be in physical contact with me 90% of the time and within 2 feet of me 100% of the time. This is also being manifested in the form of some major sleep issues still too. Because I do need to return to work, prayers in this area are much appreciated. I believe when she truly feels safe in the fact that I am her forever Mommy...permanent caregiver, this will improve. It's only been 6 weeks since "Gotcha Day" though.

I have been blessed with an extremely smart, sweet, strong willed, affectionate, tender-hearted, stubborn, hilariously entertaining, brave, strong little Sweetie!


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Location:Fun with Kaylee Mei!

Wow, it's been a long time since I've been able to write! 2 weeks of jet lag and life with a toddler hasn't left much time!

First off, my little Kaylee Mei as we're calling her now, is extremely smart. For this I'm most grateful! However, that means its virtually impossible to pull one over on her. And it also means she doesn't miss a THING!

She has such a sweet spirit and loves to cuddle. She'll place my hands on her little face and just smile. And she's almost always up for a hug from Mommy. But she's also a fighter (a characteristic that served her well during her first 2 years of life.) However, because of this, she'll fight hard for what she wants and vehemently object to what she doesn't want!

Accomplishments Kaylee Mei has made in just 17 days home:

1. LOVES baths now (have to drain the tub to get her to realize it has come to an end!)

2. Does high chair with no problems now!

3. Does car seat happily 90% of the time

4. Rides in shopping carts happily

5. LOVES the stroller

6. Tolerates her "doggie sister" Taffy

7. Gets Taffy's food and water each day with no prompting! (at least she doesn't want to starve her although she told her off in Chinese big time the other day through the day gate! LOL!)

8. Throws things in the trash and the laundry for mommy

9. Let's Mimi and Pop Pop hold her

10. No longer afraid of her pink riding pony and loves riding it now!

11. Will go down slides

English words Kaylee says:

1. More - "moooooaaaah"

2. Mimi and Pop Pop (she yelled out "Pop Pop" in the middle of church last Sunday)!

3. Shoes "soooooz"

4. Taffy "Tassie"

5. Diaper "diter"

6. Water "watah"

7. "WOW"

8. Bow

9. Lotion "lossun"

10. Powder "powdah"

11. Bye bye

12. Hi

13. Thank you - "Tay ju"

14. Glasses "gasses"

15. Eyes, ears, mouth

16. Phone (and has some kind of iPhone radar to find anyone's iPhone and snatch it in seconds!)

Her receptive language skills are amazing. So many things I ask her to do and she understands and does them!

Things Kaylee Mei doesn't like:

Teddy bears
Dolls
Books
Veggies
Cheese
Going to sleep (but hey, she's 2!)
Taffy

Things Kaylee Mei loves:

Chick Fil A
Cuddling
Walks
Her stroller
Oatmeal
Congee
V8 Fusion
Toys she has to figure out, especially nesting
Clothes and shoes (Go Kaylee!)
Mimi and Pop Pop
Baths
Bubbles
"folding" things like towels
Being generally helpful
Looking at pictures of herself (doubt she'd seen a lot before)
Oreos
"Playing" piano (wonder how that happened???)

our primary issue right now is that of going to sleep. Because of attachment issues, leaving the room and letting her cry it out isn't an option. It has to be handled very carefully. Please pray for wisdom on my part and a secure attachment on her part that will help her to trust that her current circumstances are permanent.

She also still feels the need to be holding my hand 90% of the time. I'd love if she could see me with her and feel secure a little more of the time rather than needing to be held or in physical contact. However, she was wanting to be held 90% of the time, so we're progressing!

Please keep us in mind Wednesday morning as she has her first doctor's appt. here. The physical exams in China were very rough and traumatic for her. That could cause this visit to bring back those memories.

Have to post a few Mother's Day pics here too! Couldn't have imagined a better Mother's day with my grandma, my mom, me, and my sweet daughter of only a couple weeks all together!





Kaylee lovin' her Mimi!




Kaylee loves her great grandma!





I taught Kaylee this face! Yes, charming and ladylike, I know! :)


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Location:Life back home